Everyone has their own relationship to money. We’ve developed our money-handling habits by looking at the ones around us as we grew up, either emulating their habits or using their experiences, pitfalls and successes to help inform how we allow money to rule in our own lives. You can be a spender, a saver or if you’re fortunate, a healthy mix of both. What works for one person, may not be favorable for another person. So when you enter a relationship and look at it as getting serious, it’s important to address each other’s practices as it relates to money. Here we’ll address how you can best compromise with your partner if you have differing opinions on money. Let’s start with savers.
If you’re the saver in the relationship, concern is probably your biggest driver for limiting your spending and focusing on building a nest egg; the concern of having stability in the future. You may have developed the ability to temper your wants and needs so that you can keep more money in savings. This is not to say, you don’t have typical spending impulses, but large spur of the moment purchases are rarely your MO. So what’s there to say to a saver since saving is what we’re supposed to do? Saving is good, but what’s the power in it when you don’t have a goal attached to your saving or even make time to do something you truly enjoy because you hate to see money go? As a saver, here are some things you can consider to open the door to a comfortable spending lifestyle and enjoy its thrills with your spending partner.
- You only live once: How many things can you think of that you’d love to do while on this earth? Now, how many of those things are you thinking you probably won’t do because of cost? It’s important to do everything within reason, and that’s applicable to saving too. You don’t want life and its pleasures to pass you by because you’re too focused on saving for tomorrow. You still want to enjoy the now and a few planned luxuries, which you can budget for, are well within your right.
- Good habits should be rewarded: You probably will continue to save but think about something nice you might like to do, and instead of meeting the idea with opposition, think of it as a reward for being such a spend thrift the majority of the time.
- Create goals: If you haven’t set up concrete goals with timelines, do so. If you create little goals for saving, you’ll start to move away from a hoarding mentality of your money because you will have purpose in place for your dollars. Keep your long term goals of financial security, but set small goals here and there to save up for something fun or something practical that you’ve needed or wanted (maybe a quality piece of luggage), but felt was just a little too out of your price range. You’ll be surprised with how your ability to accept these quality items and experiences that you once shied away, will increase and become more guilt free.
In our next blog, we’ll pick back up to address ways that the “spender” in the relationship can try to get their money habits in line with a savers mentality.